Model Citizen
Under pressure to find male models, a talent scout recruits a cat-calling construction worker,
giving him a taste of what it’s like to be objectified.
Who doesn’t relish a tale of tables turned? Whether one’s “beef” is served hot OR cold, Karmic justice is a form of revenge that never, EVER gets old.
In Shelly Paino’s Model Citizen, protagonist Laine would concur.
An eager-for-promotion agent at “Status Modeling Agency”, Laine’s a take-charge sort of gal. Breezing past horndog construction workers on her way to work, Laine might be a 20 something youngster, but she already knows some irritations aren’t worth her time.
But when firm boss Stella demands Laine “close the door and have a seat”, Laine’s forced to face a few pesky concerns which ARE.
Like the fact competing agents at the firm are (metaphorically) eating her lunch. According to Stella, agent Donna’s discovered a magic ingredient Laine’s clients lack:
Stella drops 8x10 glossy photos of three gorgeous girls, one at a time.
STELLA
Tall skinny, tall skinny, tall skinny.
LANIE
(bewildered)
I thought that's what-
STELLA
Well, it is what we want, but we also want to think long term.
Any one of these girls starts eating three squares a day and your numbers plummet.
LANIE
So I need to-
STELLA
Diversify! Donna's new guy for instance...
She drops a headshot of a distinguished, gray-haired gentleman.
STELLA
Father of the bride, he'll work until he dies.
Think outside the box. Scout a few plus sizes,
toss a few children into the mix.
Sure, diversification sounds easy – but where can a gal find a model who’s attractive, genuine, and yet different enough to compete with Donna’s George Clooney rip-offs? Head spinning over strategy, Laine slinks out.
So the next time construction worker DANNY cat-calls, Laine stops to take a closer look.
Actually looking at him for the first time, she throws her hands up, exasperated.
LANIE
Oh jeez.
DANNY
What?
LANIE
What do you mean what,
look at this bone structure, are you kidding me?
A few WOMEN, apparently familiar with Danny's antics pause nearby as Lanie turns Danny's face toward the light. He pulls away.
DANNY
What are you doing?
LANIE
How tall are you?
She looks him over, head to toe. His confidence wavering, he pours on the bravado.
DANNY
You like 'em tall huh? Six-two.
LANIE
Please, five-eleven if you're lucky.
The women snicker.
LANIE
You work out?
Indeed, Danny does. Sure, his attitude is Neanderthal, but visually – and in the gym - he works! Laine invites Danny up to her office, hands him a contract. With just a grunt and a signature, Danny’s propelled into Laine’s high class modeling world.
But is he “man” enough to survive? Between painful pedicures and a hair dryer that makes the sun he’s been sweating under feel like a cool breeze… Danny’s about to find out his “womanizer’s paradise” may in fact be hell!
The battle of the sexes is a goldmine for comic observations. Grab this wry easily shot gem, and you’ll luck into (cinematic) success – more than Danny thinks he did!